the daily rumpy pumpy

My week’s events

1. Asked a carpet-layer if he could spot me $10 for this really really sweet new goldfish I wanted
2. Ate the red ones last
3. Drafted up a business model for a restaurant that only serves Twinkies and sports medicine
4. Cried at yet another Sylvan Learning Center commercial
5. Sat in my truck running while enclosed in a garage too long, woke up stranded 5 miles from the Mexican border 23 hours later wearing my batman suit, a referee’s whistle and holding a half eaten bag of salted corn nuts
6. Shaked my ass
7. Bought a new boat
8. Saw a dood literally play the banjo using nothing more than his twig and berries
9. Mmm, salted corn nuts
10. Had another threesome with Jessica Simpson. This time it included the older lady from the local DMV