Man stabbed in the rear-end - Maybe he assed for it. A 38-year-old man was rushed to hospital Tuesday night after he was stabbed multiple times in the buttocks. EMS Supt. Rob Sharman said paramedics were called to a home near 108 Street and 106 Avenue at 11:20 p.m. for a report of a stabbing. They found the male victim gushing blood from his buttocks. The man was taken to the Royal Alexandra hospital in serious condition suffering from “major blood loss,” said Sharman. Police spokesman Jeff Wuite confirmed the assault on the man’s “tender area” but said no one at the scene, including the victim, would co-operate with police so no charges have been laid. Wuite couldn’t confirm reports the stabbing stemmed from a domestic dispute. Police continue to investigate the rear-end attack.

Malaysia - A 33-year-old man in northern Malaysia has married a 104-year-old woman, saying mutual respect and friendship had turned to love, a news report said Tuesday. It was Muhamad Noor Che Musa’s first marriage and his wife’s 21st, according to The Star newspaper which cited a report in the Malay-language Harian Metro tabloid. Muhamad, an ex-army serviceman said he found peace and a sense of belonging after meeting Wook Kundor, whom he said he initially sympathized with because she was childless, old and alone, the report said. “I am not after her money, as she is poor,” Muhamad reportedly said. “Before meeting Wook, I never stayed in one place for long.” He said he hoped to help his new bride to master Roman script while she taught him Islamic religious knowledge. The report did not say if any of Wook’s previous 20 husbands are still alive.

FRESNO, Calif. - A jury awarded $1.7 million Friday to a woman who was spanked in front of her colleagues in what her employer called a camaraderie-building exercise. The jury of six men and six women found Janet Orlando, 53, was subjected to sexual harassment and sexual battery when she was paddled on the rear end two years ago at Alarm One Inc., a home security company in Fresno. The jury said Orlando did not suffer from sexual assault, as she had alleged. Jurors awarded Orlando $10,000 for economic loss, $40,000 for future medical costs and $450,000 for emotional distress, pain and suffering. They awarded her an additional $1.2 million in punitive damages.