Someone forwarded this to me by email, thought I would post it here rather that clog other people’s email inboxes with it. Certainly worth a try, I guess. I’ll be camping Septmeber 1st so I won’t be buying any gas, not at $111.9 a litre here today in Surrey, B.C.

IT HAS BEEN CALCULATED THAT IF EVERYONE IN THE UNITED STATES AND CANADA DID NOT PURCHASE A DROP OF GASOLINE FOR ONE DAY AND ALL AT THE SAME TIME, THE OIL COMPANIES WOULD CHOKE ON THEIR STOCKPILES. AT THE SAME TIME IT WOULD HIT THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY WITH A NET LOSS OF OVER 4.6 BILLION DOLLARS WHICH AFFECTS THE BOTTOM LINES OF THE OIL COMPANIES.

THEREFORE SEPTEMBER 1st HAS BEEN FORMALLY DECLARED “STICK IT UP THEIR BEHIND ” DAY AND THE PEOPLE OF THESE TWO NATIONS SHOULD NOT BUY A SINGLE DROP OF GASOLINE THAT DAY.

WAITING ON THE GOVERNMENT TO STEP IN AND CONTROL THE PRICES IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE REDUCTION AND CONTROL IN PRICES THAT THE ARAB NATIONS PROMISED TWO WEEKS AGO? REMEMBER ONE THING, NOT ONLY IS THE PRICE OF GASOLINE GOING UP BUT AT THE SAME TIME AIRLINES ARE FORCED TO RAISE THEIR PRICES, TRUCKING COMPANIES ARE FORCED TO RAISE THEIR PRICES WHICH EFFECTS PRICES ON EVERYTHING THAT IS SHIPPED. THINGS LIKE FOOD, CLOTHING, BUILDING MATERIALS, MEDICAL SUPPLIES ETC. WHO PAYS IN THE END? WE DO! WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. IF THEY DON’T GET THE MESSAGE AFTER ONE DAY, WE WILL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN.

MARK YOUR CALENDARS AND MAKE SEPTEMBER 1ST A DAY THAT THE CITIZENS OF THE UNITED STATES AND CANADA SAY “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH”.

This makes me wanna go rush out and buy some pussy. Damn they’re cute as hell!

Jug

Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good looking?
A. They already have boyfriends.

Q. What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog.
A. After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

Q. Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
A. Just when it’s getting interesting, they’re finished until next time.

Q. What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
A. A private tutor.

Q. What do you call a musician without a girlfriend?
A. Homeless.

Q. What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs?
A. An elephant with diarrhea.

Q. Why did the Avon lady walk funny?
A. Her lipstick

Q. What does the cannibal do just after he dumped his girlfriend?
A. Wiped his ass.

Q. What is the smallest hotel in the world?
A. A pussy, cause you have to leave the bags outside.

Q. What do a toilet and a woman have in common?
A. Without the hole in the middle they aren’t good for shit.

Q. How can you tell a tough lesbian bar?
A. Even the pool table has no balls.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A. It’s not hard.

Q. What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers?
A. Well hung.

Q. What two words will clear out a men’s changing room quicker than anything else?
A. Nice dick!

Q. How do you know when a Barbie has her period?
A. All your tic tacks are gone.

Can you think of a word in the English language that has 3 sets of consecutive double letters in it?

Ahh the scrotum scrub. An ideal cleanser for you banjo-playin’, nut-fumblin’ ball-scratchers out there.

Clean, clean away!

Jug

California (Reuters) — Google Inc. is offering its own instant message and Web-based phone calling system, joining a crowded field of established rivals in a nearly decade-old computer communications craze.

The world leader in Internet search confirmed reports on Tuesday that it plans to add instant messaging from Wednesday, together with Web-based phone calling to the growing menu of technology options it offers beyond simply trawling the Web.

Google Talk is seeking to elbow its way in among four instant messaging Web communities that number more than 10 million users each, ranging from market leader AOL, with AIM and ICQ brands, to Yahoo Inc., Microsoft and two-year-old European Web chat phenomenon, Skype.

“This is a missing piece in Google’s larger strategy as they emerge to become a bigger Internet media player,” said Greg Sterling, an analyst with the Kelsey Group who had been briefed by the company on its Google Talk strategy.

A trial version, in English only initially, can be found at http://www.google.com/talk. Users need to have a Google Gmail account. The computer-to-computer Web calling software requires speakers and a microphone, or a computer-ready headset.

Get your nickname while their hot!

Jug

On a serious note, I am participating in The Terry Fox 10km run/walk for Cancer this September 18th at 10am PST and would really like your support via monetary donation or participation in the event. If donating, it can be as small as $5 or as much as you feel comfortable with (you receive a Tax Receipt with donations of $10 or more).

Ideally $25 would be great but whatever you can do will help. I am participating in memory of my Grandpa Maxwell and Grandpa Miller and trying to reach $100 in pledges.

Click here to be directed to my “Participant” page

I want to stress how important this is to me. I hope you know I would be first in line to support whatever you believe in so let’s work together to end cancer and keep Terry’s dream alive. All money raised goes to cancer research; please support my participation by clicking on the above link.

With warmest regards,

Jug

1. Had a $2.99 breakfast from Denny’s, realized I AM out of my mind
2. Smoked a pack of candy cigarettes
3. Took the term “Reach out and touch someone” literally… met a really nice guy named Bob on the train after invading his personal space
4. Sneezed out a half used bar of soap and partial spaghetti noodle
5. Challenged myself to a game of Hungry Hungry Hippo, but later chickened out
6. Played “Fight Club” backwards in slo-mo and realized there was no fighting… everyone was being really nice to eachother
7. Went water rafting, damn near fell out of the boat screaming “I go, we go!”
8. In the spirit of Sean “P. Diddy” Combs changing his name to just “Diddy”, I too changed my name: “Fuffil Plorang III”
9. Set out to change the term for alcohol from “Spirits” to “Foo Foos”
10. T-minus 264 days to my birthday

Q. What’s the difference between butter and a blonde?
A. Butter is difficult to spread.

Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A. Pull the pin and throw it back.

Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
A. Artificial intelligence.

Q. What do you call a blonde standing on her head?
A. A brunette with bad breath.

Q. What do blondes and cow shit have in common?
A. The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.

Q. How does a blond turn on the light after sex?
A. She opens the car door.

Q. What’s the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A. When you smack the mosquito it stops sucking!!

Q. What does a blonde say the last two words of the national anthem are?
A. Play ball!

Q. What do smart blondes and UFO’s have in common?
A. You always hear about them but never see them.

Q. Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
A. Cause it said concentrate.

Don’t these two perform the same task?

McDonald’s: Kills you slowly
Bin Laden: Kills you quickly

So why not combine the two for a tasty treat bound to kill you at a medium pace?